Advice, Career, Loss

Kiss your guilt good bye

Dear blogging community,

I was let go today. I’ve been working for the same company for over a year and this news was very unexpected, and heartwrenching.

Yes, I was a freelancer, but I still feel like I was sucker punched deep in the gut and my  sense of self worth  was deflated like an old tire swing. I hate that I didn’t see it coming; I’ve always placed a lot of personal value in my work, which is why it feels so terrible, because you can’t help but feel like you somehow deserved it (even if they tell you it’s downsizing and nothing gross in your performance).

After a lot of crying and googling “what to do” articles, there is one thing that’s clear: I can’t control what has happened to me. I can only control what I do moving forward.

However, before I become a gung-ho, positive polly, job-searching ninja,  I am going to need a ONE long, epic deep breath, TWO hearty swigs of argentinian wine, THREE large bars of Ikea dark chocolate, and FOUR more episodes of Lost(kickin it old school!). Oh, and add five bottles of aquafina so my tear ducts can continue to flourish against my will.

On a serious note,  for anyone going through a similar, extremely difficult situation, I beg you not to feel too embarassed or defeated. I’m struggling with this sentiment as I write and was even hesitant to share this news. Yet, I know I’m not alone, and I certainly don’t want anyone else to feel that way.

You’ve got to blog about the happy and sad, right?

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